The Dog Pound of Daddies |
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?The dog pound of daddies, which is the political arena, gives us a President, then we put him on a platform and start punishing him and screaming at him because Daddy can't do miracles.? ? John Lennon 1961 John F. Kennedy was the handsome father who died unexpectedly when we were all still young. We?ll forever wonder what might have been. 1963 Lyndon Baines Johnson stepped in to care for the family after our young father died. More of an uncle than a father, he was weird around the dogs, and didn?t look like us. 1969 Nixon seemed more like a stepfather. The relationship was awkward from the beginning. He never understood the kids. 1974 And after the divorce, of course, what we needed more than anything was another sympathetic uncle. Enter Gerald Ford. Bumbling, yes, but kind. 1977 Then Jimmy. The Peanut Farmer. I suppose if you were from Georgia, he could be your father. But for the rest of us? He just talked funny. 1981 Ronald Reagan, finally, was a real father again. Loveable, winking, always ready to pull a magic quarter from behind one of the children?s ears. Or maybe he was more the grandfather? Didn?t matter. He had that paternal, protective quality. And it was pretty neat having a movie star in the family. 1989 George H. W. Bush managed to seem like someone?s father, but not necessarily our father. More likely, he was the dad who headed up the quiet Presbyterian family down the block; the clean-cut fellow who washed his car every Saturday morning, never cursed in public, and golfed in a cardigan sweater. He seemed harmless enough. But then, why was he married to Grandmom? 1993 Bill Clinton was too young to be anyone?s father (except Chelsea), and anyway, the media made so much of the close ties Bill had to his mother that we were left with the indelible impression of a dutiful son. To us, then, he became the older brother. We were so proud of him. Such infinite potential. But you know, in our family, it seems like we have a lot of screw-ups. 2001 Which brings us to George W. the Second. The poor man couldn?t ever be a real father figure, because his father got there first. Nothing more than a Son of a Bush. 2008 What a choice? The lady or the tiger? |
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