Topp Twitters Corpse!

 

DALLAS

 

Hey, what's the latest on who shot J.R.?

 

 

 

BIN LADEN

 

Osama bin Laden is mean.

 

 

 

WANTED

 

Anyone know a Christian bowhunter? Need answer ASAP.

 

 

 

QUESTION

 

Hey, what's the age of consent in NYC? I'm going to need a quick

answer for this.

 

 

 

OPTIMISTIC

 

Sometimes I lie but this time I'm telling the truth. It's funny

because it's true.

 

 

 

HISTORY

 

I'm pretty sure some MILF molested me when I was a teenager, but I may

have dreamt it.

 

 

 

I CAN'T STOP

 

I can't stop torturing people with this broom handle! I am so compulsive!

 

 

 

FOUR O'CLOCK

 

Is anyone else noticing the expanding universe?

 

 

 

CONCEIT

 

If I had to describe myself in one word, it would be "genius man."

 

 

 

BELL

 

Does the bell mean the end of this round or the beginning of the next

round? Intense...

 

 

 

JAPAN

 

Um, Japan is America.

 

 

 

PAUL & VIRGINIA

 

Paul took his pants off and Virginia rubbed Ben-Gay on his penis,

pubes and thighs.

 

 

 

ONE-MAN SHOW

 

Just watched Rosie O'Donnell on Mark Twain Tonight and she was so good.

 

 

 

TODAY

 

I just played "What is your porn name?" on Facebook and I got Irving Kelso.

 

 

 

 

IN THE COUNTRY

 

Well, what do you think I found in my stool today? GUESS!! GUESS YOU

MOTHERFUCKERS!!

 

 

 

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT

 

Goddammit! I am so tired of paying top dollar for urine tests.

 

 

 

HOT

 

Hot in leather... Right?

 

 

 

LOVE

 

Love doesn't hurt. Gonorrhea hurts.

 

 

 

A MINI OBSERVATION

 

Decision to shit in the pool was not a good one.

 

 

 

MENSWEAR

 

 

You can't spell "menswear" without "men swear."