Five Poems Con Leche y Sangre by Merilyn Jackson |
by Merilyn Jackson |
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SOMEWHAT AFTER THE MANNER OF CERTAIN GALILEANS
Don't call me Jesus I hiss at him. If I work the miracle call me by my name. Gruffly, he calls my name - the smoky report of a gun - until our feet begin to sink beneath the crust of the sea.
I, who never doubted this kind of ending, ready myself to swim. He too is preparing - taking in gladesful of air. I smile. I see there will be air enough for both of us. I scream. I let myself scream because now he is breathing for me. He laughs, not minding the extravagance of my Berber ululations. Simply, he breathes in another gladeful.
We are going under. So he tells me the story of his earliest love. Hot, hooligan love.
When I reach for his hand he takes mine firmly. If we go we'll go together.
I can see that he recognizes, with a shock, that I am the hooligan of his youth. And soon, as the water begins to flood our lungs, he sees that I am all the women who ever loved him.
So disturbing is this, he lifts me above the waterline. We are choking and gasping, glistening with death, but he displays me to the sunlight roughly tearing back my hair, crushing my jaw in his coarse fingers, twisting my head, forcing me to gaze into the sun.
Once my eyes have turned to amber coals he peers deeply into the blaze. Jesus, oh Jesus, his husky curse.
I push his head down Deep, under the water.
My Moses.
He takes me to his mouth like a reed. I am blind but I am breathing for both of us. Don't call me Jesus, I hiss.
POLSKA
Polska, he blurted, face full of marvel and mirth At the irony of the land of my mother’s birth.
Polska, his deep slow grumbling shook me to my feet a tank across my terrain, rumbling a love letter piercingly sweet from the mouth of a Saturday Night Special.
He studied my face gazing back at him, proud. Chin up, Girl, Don’t give this man any ground.
Polska, my mother always said, “Never show a man your whole ass.” What could that mean? Never show a man your ass whole? What could happen?
What cheek to turn? What cleft to cover? What cleavage to close?
Why the ass? Why not the breasts? Questions you dare not ask Your mother, or her guests.
Oh, moja Matka, if only I knew How to discern your advice. Had you not been so cryptic You might have spared His five o’clock shadow My Sssinnabar lipstick.
Why not just tell me what’d make him click his heels Jawohl bend his steely spine over mine melt his thighs till he kneels part his smile for my bite offer his boyish neck till he purrs with delight at each lick and each peck waving his banner, white with such brave surrender no General could ever tender.
Mama, you ironed my sheet When we had no heat. Now his smile warms me, quivering like soft whips, little love flames flicking at my back. But wait! He bridles, casting his smile in total eclipse. Look Ma, he knows how to cover his ass Better than I do. What class!
If I am so bold and so naughty Perhaps he should take me over his knee slap me until he leaves a tattoo Of his palm, now so red and haughty.
In my perfume He surrenders again Oh what creatures Are these men? Ist das a mann?
I was born with white paper that his eyes sear blue words upon.
Polska, he murmurs Voice gone hoarse and husky, Eyes gone deep and dusky, Ich kűsse Ihre Hand.
ONCE WHAT WAS WHITENESS
Six nights snow paled the landscape as they wandered toward its center, she in her bridal gown, he in silver marten.
Ermine, swagging from her shoulders, cleft a trail behind them, erasing their traces.
In the swirling night their cheeky erubescence glowed. At first light, birds attacked.
He snatched two purple martins from the cliffs of her cheekbones and kissed the hot pepper stippling the sheer flesh below.
"Maliny," he teased
"Raspberries?" she scorned, "you stupid dreamer"
But she brushed clean his punctures from the struggling birds smothering them in her icy fleece.
They had no fire so they lay their catch beside them and built an altar.
They shaped its spires with many facets which, at nightfall, caught flickers of moonlight through her veil.
By day's break six spires rose above the drifts.
Crows nested on the capstones drowsing.
She mounted the altar Beneath her feet marbled vines twined through their engraved names
The netting of her headdress whipped into ribbons winding round the pinnacles
The crows caught them in their beaks And, cushioning their nests - immobilized her.
She spread her arms and looked down to him for her freedom.
He loosened the pearls that clasped her wrists and pulled her bodice laces through embroidered eyelets.
"Nasz bialy dom," he said.
"Our white home," she mocked, "but it has no roof"
Her cape billowed A sail An escape
A shelter
With the beaks of their frozen martins he fastened her cape to the capstones
The damask gown of countless ancestors drifted to her ankles as she stood captive and lustral.
He knelt, carving scoops of fresh snow into gardenias which he lay in a pyre at her feet.
She arched her neck to better catch their scent
Her breasts glazed Below her belly red-black curls crystallized.
His tongue brushed away these frosts and, as if mining rare mineral delved prayerful hands into her darkness.
The sleeves of her gown beribboned his ankles Before he freed himself, her heels on the mouths of the sleeves tethered him.
She bowed back her torso upending her breasts to the sun.
"Slonce," she whispered, "moj slonce" And the sun, obeying her appelation, melted the spires lowering her into an act of consubstantiation.
Imperceptably, the altar, too, evanesced beneath them - and their names with it.
II.
The mingled scents of rotting gardenias, man and woman, earth steaming with sun-baked snow, brought small animals
Auburn foxes sniffed at the altar's pools Buff fawns licked at the base of the last spire Umber hares nosed their way above the groundline to see an alien vista- vaporous loam, lacy domes of hollow snowdrifts, spindly trees with awkward muffs of new growth along the trunks
His neck snapped as if from a blow and with his wizened eyes he squinted to see, many roods away, a horizon coronaded by the smokestacks of his blackened cities.
At a sharpening of his hip he shifted aside picking out shards of obsidian. With her hair he braided these together and laid them as a collar around her neck.
"Moszimy idze," he commanded she looked down at the soiled ermine, the tattered satin, the muddied gauze of her veil
"Yes, but we can't go naked," she said
He slipped the altar cloth from under her It remained starched and dry. As they stood he wrapped the linen over both their shoulders
They began to walk toward the city beneath the darkest cloud. As they struggled through the slime their toes raked up tendrils of still rootless poppies.
Near to the city, the ground dried and small stones cut their feet.
She found them a dry rock and unlacing the yellowing shoots from between their toes she wove them into sandals
In these they passed under the arch of this turreted city unnoticed.
"Lubisz mnie?" he asked her "In the pit of my belly I do," she said
"You're so physical...I want you to love me with your head and with your heart"
"That was once possible in our white home," she said, caressing him "Snow blind and snow bound, We didn't know about our bellies."
HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME LAUGH LIKE THAT?
How dare you make me open my throat to drink And then pull the bottle’s lip away? How dare you give me those sweet looks Then turn to me with eyes gone gray? How dare you let me open my ears to hear And then go mute looking only to play?
I am crying. You see me crying? Si tu veux de moi, Ne te moque pas de moi! Isn’t this amusing to you?
I forbid you ever to make me laugh again.
DORMANT
Deep inside me lives a tiny, wild creature lambent, waiting, purring.
To quell that darling thing would kill my essence. So, shush, little one, Sleep.
Dream of your companion to come one night, rampant, stealthy, inside you.
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